Tuesday Morning Hangover — Week Three

Something good is coming out of this season…I can feel it.

Shaking out the Season

The hits keep coming and they don’t stop.

Where do we want to start? Saquan? C’mon, were you really surprised? Maybe that it happened Week Three, but that guy carried the team all last season, and was looking to have to do it again this season. Maybe Daniel Jones gives them some new life (there was a last second victory), but maybe Saquan is better off just sitting out a half dozen games.

We could talk about the continuing sage of Antonio Brown, but why? The bigger issue is that Brady also lost Edleman Sunday, who by all accounts is the most important receiver on the team. T.Y. Hilton was forced out of the 2nd half for the Colts, and Shady McCoy, who was looking to have a resurgence with Andy Reid and Damian Williams out, left the game with an ankle injury. And that’s just the big names from the offensive side of the ball that you know.

So nice, this season for some teams.

In the meantime, the Bills and Patriots are 3-0. So are the Chiefs and the Rams…

And in perhaps the most throwback ’90s feel ever, the Cowboys, 9ers, and Pack are all 3-0. And the Lions are undefeated!

That’s bound to change as Week Four brings the AFC East unbeatens together, the Lions trying to Lionze the Chiefs, and the Pack and Cowboys playing the Eagles and the Saints…we’ll see who joins the 9ers, with a Week Four bye, as still undefeated come Week Five.

Speaking of undefeated, I bet my Horrible Fantasy Team is still undefeated against yours!

The Horrible Fantasy Team That Beat Your Team

For those of you unaware, this is a weekly team composed of players generally owned by less than 50% of people in leagues. This is not a suggestion for sleepers to go grab, though there may be a few here.

QB — Daniel Jones — 336 yards passing, 2 TD, 28 rushing, 2 TD — 16% owned
WR — Taylor Gabriel — 6 receptions for 75 and 3 TDs — 3% owned
WR — Philip Dorsett II — 6 receptions for 53 and a TD — 32% owned
RB — Tony Pollard — 13 carries for 103 yards and a TD, 3 rec. for 25 — 17% owned
RB — Rex Burkhead — 11 carries for 47 and a TD, 6 rec. for 22 — 24% owned
TE — Will Dissly — 6 receptions for 62 and a TD — 44% owned
Flex — Darrel Williams — 9 carries for 62, 5 rec. for 47 — 6% owned
K — Dan Bailey — 2/2 FG, 4/4 XP — 12% owned
Def — Jets — 1 sack, 1 INTs, 1 Fumble recovery, 2 TDs — 6% owned

Let me know if you’ve got a squad that took down my team of rejects!

Recaps

Tennessee @ Jacksonville
Minshew to the Rescue

Back in the day…

Gardner Minshew II is probably already racing up everyone’s boards as one of their favorite surprises so far in an NFL season that’s already taken a ton of hits. So here’s a little story for you.

At East Carolina University, Minshew was a few back for the starting job, but, surprise surprise, due to injury, found himself inserted into the game. The next week, the usual guy was back healthy, and just like that Minshew had given up a year of eligibility for a half of football. The only way to avoid that fate was to get himself a medical redshirt. So Minshew, seeing no alternative, turned to his buddy Jack Daniels and a hammer, and attempted to break his hand. He failed, but still, that was more fire than the Tennessee Titans showed all night Thursday night.

I’ve never seen a team play with less urgency down two scores in the 4th quarter. Sure, the offensive line wasn’t having the best of days, allowing Mariota to get sacked 9 times, but at least half of those were from his inability to get the ball out of the pocket. And the lack of winning mentality is going to start affecting team morale as Delanie Walker was showing his displeasure.

As for the Jags, they didn’t do anything overly impressive. Sure, Minshew looked good, and that connection with DJ Chark seems to be legit, but the Tennessee defense largely held them in check, limiting Fournette to -3 yards on 14 carries (and 1 carry for 69 yards???)

Next week Tennessee looks to find some answers as they head to Atlanta to face as just a discombobulated Falcons team, while the Jags head to Denver to hopefully continue their winning ways against a bad Broncos team.

Cincinnati @ Buffalo
Standing Tall Now

Seriously, send us a message if you had the Bills at 3-0 before the season started. Albeit, their competition hasn’t been fierce, but at the same time, you probably can’t name a single wide receiver on the team. Or their running back. Because it’s still Frank Gore. My God, how does he continue to be this productive? He averaged 5.4 yards a carry and got into the end zone. After 15 season. We talk about Brady and his endurance at 42, but Gore is 36 and never been afraid of contact.

But really, who else on the Bills team? You don’t know unless you’re a super fan or play in a deep fantasy league. But look out, Cole Beasley may be a PPR machine, and John Brown by way of Baltimore after Arizona may have found a new home. And Josh Allen is slowly winning me over at QB.

The Bengals still made this a game, and the young receiving corps continues to flesh itself out in the absence of A.J. Green. Perhaps the best news of the week was how well Joe Mixon played after going out in Week Two. While the Bengals are 0-3, there seems to be a continued trend in the right direction for a team under new leadership.

Next week, a meeting with the flailing Steelers might be the cure for what ails them, as the Bills put their 3-0 record up against the Patriots as they play host in a match-up of undefeated teams.

Miami @ Dallas
Feelin’ like the 90’s…

Break it back out again this year!

What if I told you that the Dolphins had a chance to take the lead going into half, on the road, against the super-paid Cowboys?

Would you guess they fumbled it away? Of course! And then it was all downhill, but for brief second, there was hope. But the Dolphins first half started with a decent drive that ended in a missed field goal, and a Kenyon Drake fumble on 1st and Goal from the 7.

In a week when every other new starting QB seemed to get help, Josh Rosen couldn’t even finish the game, leaving Fitzmagic to take the final snaps.

As for the Cowboys? What is there to say right now? They looked poised for a Super Bowl run. Amari Cooper looks like the real deal and not just a flash in the pan at the end of the season. Like Mark Ingram in Baltimore, Cooper is another Alabama product redeeming his name on a new team. Jason Witten has risen from the broadcast ashes to become a reliable weapon for Dak. And, as Chef Chad says, Zeke is your Kobe beef…never lets you down.

They’ll take their 3-0 record to New Orleans to play a Saints team that looks like it’s rebounded sans Brees. The Dolphins on the other hand host the Chargers, who will be looking to get to .500 after yet another slow start.

Denver @ Green Bay
World of Suck

Not my words. Not Manny Sanders words. They apparently come from Vic Fangio’s lips, and everyone knows it. But let’s not be surprised. There was no money on the Broncos heading up to Lambeau and beating the Pack. Still, 0-3 doesn’t feel good no matter who your opponents are, and Denver hasn’t really played great opponents. They made the Derek Carr Bombs look competent Week One, and then took a bounce-back game loss to a team very similar to them in the Bears, in that neither team knows what it has at quarterback.

Maybe Flacco just needs time to get on the same page with these receivers, but he was also responsible for two turnovers. And with six sacks on the day, the Green Bay D didn’t let him wait around much. But, how many losses does it take before you start looking at the next guy up behind center?

How is it that John Elway is the worst QB evaluator ever? He hasn’t much choice now. Behind Flacco are Drew Lock, who is on the IR, and Brandon Allen out of Arkansas that none of us have ever heard of. And he’s probably the answer, just riding the pine…

At the same time, I’m not completely buying into this 3-0 Packer team. They’ve shown flashes of brilliance, but they seemed to have had to escape at the end of each game so far from teams they had dominated in the 1st half. Their run game still needs major work as they finished with only 77 yards on the ground. Heck, they just barely cracked 300 yards of total offense. Maybe this is just who the Packers are now and I have yet to accept it.

We’ll see how real that 3-0 is as they head to Philly to take on the struggling Eagles, who are going to be looking for any way to get to 2-2 when the dust settles. The Broncos play host to a troublesome match-up against Minshew and the Jags, who look to have their own defense shine.

Atlanta @ Indianapolis
Falcons Don’t Fly on the Road

C’mon, just get up! You can do it!

If you just look at the final score, you’d be deceived into thinking this was a good game, but much like Week One in Minnesota, the Dirty Birds didn’t do much until the 4th quarter to make this a game, and by that time, the Colts just had to play enough defense, up 20-3 at half.

There’s little upside here for Atlanta except that there were a few signs of life from Devonta Freeman. Otherwise, this Falcons team is exactly what you’d expect them to be both in real football and in fantasy.

Indy, on the other hand, continue to impress with Jacoby Brissett behind the wheel. Much of his success comes from the fact that the Colts have been successfully running the ball this season with Mack, but both sides work the best when they work in tandem, and right now the Colts seem to be firing on all cylinders.

Even Vinatieri was perfect this game after missing 5 kicks in the first two weeks. The only downside is that T.Y. Hilton didn’t make it out of the match-up unscathed.

But if he can get back next week, and if the Colts can take down the Raiders at home to get to 3-1, Andrew Luck may really become a distant memory. As for the Dirty Birds…they’re at home, which is good, playing the Titans, which should be good, but also the type of game Atlanta loses all the time lately.

Baltimore @ Kansas City
Will the Real MVP Please Stand Up?

The scariest thing about Mahomes and Andy Reid is how they keep finding weapons for this team. Tyreek Hill goes down? No problem, here’s Demarcus Robinson and Mecole Hardman. Kareem Hunt off the team and Damian Williams hurt, don’t worry, we’ll go get an ‘ole Reid reliable Shady to carry the load, and use the other D. Williams, Darrel.

I haven’t seen this level of next man up since the Patriots of the mid-aughts.

And they can score so quickly it’s like watching Spurrier coached Florida Gator teams.

But the Ravens hung tough, on the road against an offensive juggernaut, and they took their shots. It could be argued that Harbaugh was too aggressive at times, going for it on 4th down and passing up on extra points for two point conversations in a game that was ultimately decided by 5 points, but I like it. I like everything about this new look Ravens team, and for the record, I hate the Ravens. Or maybe I just hate Al Del Greco and that missed field goal in 2000. Yes, I’m still bitter, but these Ravens look dangerous. And they’re using my least favorite Saint, Mark Ingram, to get the job done. And man, does he fit perfectly in Baltimore.

And they made an offer for Jalen Ramsey. It got turned down, but that’s not the point. The point is there’s a fire burning in that organization to win win win.

So I’m high on these Ravens as they host the rudderless Browns next week. As for KC, they head up to Detroit and hope to not get Lionzed on their way to 4-0.

Oakland @ Minnesota
Now We’re Cookin’ with Gas

How you like me now? Shoulda drafted me on your fantasy team!

I’m probably completely wrong about both of these teams, but this game has given us a pretty clear view of what they are. The Raiders are still a work in progress, despite the promise of a Week One victory. I’ll admit, now that AB is back in school, part of me wonders what would have happen if he’d stayed in Oak-town at the School of Hard Knocks, but I digress.

Look, these Raiders will get better, but they’re still going to be bad this year, even for fantasy. Though Darren Waller is an increasingly interesting tight end play, and Ty Williams is probably a WR3 or Flex in most leagues. Regardless, not much promise at the moment and with games upcoming against the Colts, Bears, Packers, and Texans, the offense isn’t going to find many holes.

As for the Vikes, hold tight Minnesota fans. I really think this is a year to look forward to when the season started. So far, the Vikes have two blowout wins at home and one loss in Lambeau. Now, sure, Cousins still isn’t looking incredible, and last week against GB he needed to in order to win that game, but the Vikings seem like they’re gelling as a unit overall, and Dalvin Cook (please stay healthy) looks like a beast again. Imagine if they’d held onto Bridgewater instead of sending him to the be the Savior of the Saints…

The Vikes have another tough divisional road match-up next week against the Bears, who looked halfway competent Monday night. The Raiders on the other hand travel to Indy to see if they can dampen the Brissett era.

New York Green @ New England
You’ve Been Here Before…

There’s nothing to talk about here. This game was so bad that Brady actually came out, which he didn’t even do in last week’s 43-0 blowout, and let Jarrett Stidham get some reps.

Maybe the Jets would be better if Sam Darnold didn’t have mono, but they still weren’t winning this game.

Put a fork in the Jets. Maybe there will be some life when Darnold comes back, but for now, ugh. No thank you.

The Patriots are the Patriots are the Patriots. But keep an eye on Brady’s favorite target. Edleman could be out next week with a rib injury, and who knows how that affects him going forward in general.

And they may need him as the Pats head over to Buffalo to play the 3-0 Bills for the lead of the AFC East. As for the Jets, they get a Week Four bye, and with Darnold expected back, they may catch a reeling Philly team off-guard.

Detroit @ Philadelphia
The Lions are Undefeated!!!

Can we use this again next week?

It’s crazy to think if not for a Week One collapse that the Lions could be 3-0. Even at 2-0-1, no one saw this coming, not even the Lions.

And I’m not even sure how they’re doing it. This week, turnovers and special teams. The Lions had their first kickoff returned for a touchdown since December 8, 2013…which also came against the Eagles in Philly.

At the same time, Philly’s D held Stafford to just over 200 yards and Kerryon Johnson to a meager 36 yards on 20 carries.

But fumbles killed drives, and Carson Wentz down two of his biggest weapons couldn’t stop the Eagles from getting Lionzed.

And things don’t get any easier as the Eagles head up to Lambeau on a short week to play TNF against the 3-0 Pack. The one upside is that they may get Alshon Jeffery back for that match-up.

As for the Lions, they look to play spoiler as Patty Mahomes and Friends come to town.

Carolina @ Arizona
Rookies Rookies Everywhere

Last offseason, Cam Newton teased the idea of taking the 2019 season off to recuperate, a la Andrew Luck. I was all for it. Cam has truly been one of the most fascinating players since he came into the league, and not just because of his off the field antics. His campaign of giving children touchdown balls last season was especially heart-warming.

But he came out and played anyway, and maybe it was partly because he knew what was on the bench behind him.

I keep talking about that young core in Cincy, with Mixon, Boyd, Ross III, etc. They just need to replace Dalton and get that ship righted. The Panthers seem the same way with McCaffrey, Moore, and Samuel…and maybe now with rookie QB Kyle Allen.

But it’s one game. I’m getting ahead of myself. This was against the Cardinals.

And what about the Cards? This is another team that just, I don’t know. What do you take away from this Cards team besides that they’re learning? Maybe feel bad for Larry Fitzgerald? If the Cards can figure out how to shore up their offensive line, they’ve got a team, but for now, this is all just a big work in progress.

Next week, they host the Seahawks, who will look to bounce back after this week’s loss to the Saints. As for the Panthers, they head over to play the Texans, in what may be one of the more entertaining match-ups of the week.

New York Blue @ Tampa Bay
Enter Jones, Exit Barkley

He even kinda looks like Eli…

For one day, Giants fans got to feel on top of the world. Sure, the Eli era was over, but look at Eli 2.0!!!!!

I can’t even remember how many people hated this pick back in April, but I wasn’t one of them. I’ll admit, I thought 6th overall was too high, but if he’s your guy and you don’t think he’s going to be there later, you take him when you can take him. And there isn’t a more perfect successor to the throne of New York than the kid who’s been to all the Manning QB camps and played under the Mannings’ college coach.

But, then Barkley goes down for maybe 8 weeks. The football gods do giveth, and they do taketh away.

For a half, though, it looked like Famous Jameis had righted his ship, finding Mike Evans, whom he had forgotten was on the team prior to this week, for 3 first half TDs. Of course, in true Bucs fashion, they let that lead slip away, and all the praise and joy flowed forth onto New York Blue.

Things don’t get any easier as the Bucs travel to LA to play the Rams. The Giants get to roll out the red carpet at home as they look to get back to .500 against the Racial Slurs and continue Daniel Jones’s winning ways.

Houston @ Los Angeles Bolts
Getting Stronger

The Texans are getting to be one of those teams that I don’t know how you stop once they get started. Their opening day loss only came because Drew Brees had the ball last. Otherwise…

Case in point. The Chargers took a 10 point lead into half and had to be feeling pretty good about themselves. Then, after an initial punt, the Texans rattled off three straight touchdown drives to essentially seal the win. Deshaun Watson is just scary with what he can do with the football, and it’s exciting to see the quarterback renaissance that appears to be emerging with players such as Watson, Mahomes, Jackson, and Murray.

As for the Chargers, it’s about par for the course at this point. I don’t know how many Chargers’ seasons I’ve seen where they start something like 1-2 or worse before storming back in the 2nd half of the season, often too late for a playoff spot, but early enough to ruin other teams’ chances.

At some point, you just feel bad for Philip Rivers and Keenan Allen, right?

At least they head to Miami to play the Dolphins next week. Ah, dumpster fires. As for the Texans, they host those new look Panthers in perhaps the game of the week.

Pittsburgh @ San Francisco
Sloppy Still Wins

Football shouldn’t look like this. Even Chef’s food shouldn’t look like this.

Usually, the team that wins the turnover battle wins the game, especially if they’re a +3 differential.

But then, it’s also said, he he fumbles last, fumbles away the game, which is exactly what the Steelers did, as James Conner coughed up the ball on Pitt’s own 24, giving the 9ers a short field to win the game.

But this was still a pretty ugly game for the most part, with the Steelers leading 6-3 at halftime.

Maybe I’m not giving the defenses enough credit, and it was Mason Rudolph’s first real action this season, but still. I’m not sure what to do here. On paper, I would have had the 9ers winning this game by a lot more and not needing some last second dominoes to fall their way.

Still, the Steelers were fighting with everything not to start 0-3, but it wasn’t enough, and I’m not sure what to do with this team going forward. They’re like a bunch of others right now, the Cards, Bengals, Panthers…they’re in some weird mid-season rebuild. And they’ll take that rebuild and see if they’ve got it more right than the Bengals this week.

The 9ers are 3-0, and are actual threats for playoff positioning for the first time since Kaep. Of course, they get next week off with a way too early Week Four bye, but 4-0 should be in their wheelhouse when they host the Browns on MNF.

New Orleans @ Seattle
Oh What a Difference a Week Makes

The entire state of Louisiana drank their woes away this week, so much so that they ran Vanderbilt out of beer. There were offers of fans willing to donate their thumbs so that Brees could play. It was a sad time, and would it be Bridgewater? He looked awful in relief last week against the Rams…

And then a week passes, Sean Payton gets Bridgewater the reps he needs with the first team and tailors the game for him. He throws off everyone saying that they’d probably run a 2 QB set. And then, like magic, Teddy Bridgewater emerges to outduel Russell Wilson in the home of the 12th man, and just like that, everything is right in Who Dat Nation.

Of course, it doesn’t hurt when you’ve got guys like Alvin Kamara and Michael Thomas on your side, and a defense that is criminally underrated, especially up front.

As for the Seahawks, they need to find a running game, and quickly. I’ve been a Chris Carson supporter for two seasons now, but after another costly fumble this game, I just don’t know how much more you can trust him going forward. The problem is, Seattle doesn’t have much in terms of back-up, especially with Rashaad Penny out. Carson could still put it together, but this could also turn into a running back by committee backfield.

Because of that, pray that Wilson can stay healthy as he chucks it 50 times a game. Maybe next week at the Cardinals they can find a more balanced attack and stay in the running in the NFC West.

As for the Saints, they host the Cowboys in a game that everyone probably had them losing after last week, but now looks to be maybe the other game of the week.

Los Angeles Horns @ Cleveland
Hype Train Over?

I’m good enough, I’m smart enough, and gosh darnit, people like me.

I was on the verge this off-season of hopping on the Browns Party Wagon and riding out of the cellar with them. The only problem I had was Freddie Kitchens. And not even for the reasons that everyone else now has a problem with Kitchens. I just…it’s never good when you let players dictate who their coaches should be, even if they’ve fully established themselves. How many times has it ever really worked?

Maybe with LeBron and Tryonn Lue?

Not that Gregg Williams is probably having any fun in Jets-land with Adam Gase, but still, he has to be taking some small pleasure in watching the Browns start 1-2 (though the one win did come against the Jets). If they were going to promote someone internally last season, Williams should have been the guy.

The question now is, how long until the wheels come completely off the bus? Can you see OBJ sitting quietly on the bench when he’s not even looked at on the final four plays, starting with 1st & Goal from the 4? Not to mention they didn’t even try to run Nick Chubb, who was averaging 4.2 yards a carry, even with all three timeouts in their back pocket. And I’m not even talking about the stupid draw play on 4th & 8 earlier in the quarter.

Not that the Rams look any better, but damn that defense is sexy. Still, they just paid Goff a freaking mint to see him go 24/38 for 269 and a 2/2 TD/INT ratio. The Rams are 3-0 right now as they’ve lucked out against bad teams and hurt Brees last week. They could just as easily be 0-3 at this point.

But they do get the Bucs at home, and likely move to 4-0, and still are one of the most suspect teams out there.

The Browns get a tough divisional match-up in Baltimore that probably isn’t going to have anyone feeling any better about the Browns’ prospects.

Chicago @ Washington
Fires Fires Everywhere

At one point in the night, Chef Chad turned to the group and asked, “Are the Racial Slurs really this bad?”

Answer, yes. Yes they are.

Yet with 7 minutes left in the 4th quarter, the Racial Slurs were driving, driving, driving, and only down by 13, there was hope. Maybe they’d figured the Bears’ D out. Maybe Case Keenum was going to save another mediocre game performance which had already seen him turn the ball over 4 times, including an opening drive pick six. And then came the QB sneak on 4th & 1, resulting in the fumble (turnover #5!!!!), and game over.

I’ll admit, losing Derrius Guice again for most of the season hurts, but with other teams already pulling the string on their rookies, how long until we see Dwayne Haskins? Not this week according to Jay Gruden, but without his brother to help him, how long is he going to have a head coaching job anyway?

As for you Bears fans, how do you feel? Did that game make you feel good about a Mitch Trubisky that couldn’t find the end zone in Weeks One or Two? Taylor Gabriel, who caught all three of those TDs, left the game Monday night with a concussion. I just don’t know how to feel about this Bears team, even sitting at 2-1. I do like rookie David Montgomery though, and I hope they continue to feed him the rock since they seem to have forgotten how to use Tarik Cohen.

Next week Washington travels to help the Giants and Daniel Jones get back-to-back wins, while the Bears host the Vikings in one of the underrated games of the week.

Washington’s trying to 1-up Miami’s dumpster fire!